Friday, November 30, 2007


Thirty days has November

And thirty posts has this blog as of... now. Whew! That was a close one. I mean, damn, do you see how close to midnight it is? Do you KNOW how stupid it would be for me to make it all the way to the end of NaBloPoMo only to blow it on the last day? I laugh just thinking about it. Ha ha.

p.s. This posting every day business? It's kinda hard.
p.p.s. November is hella long.
p.p.p.s. Katie, you're my hero.
p.p.p.p.s. Sorry for all the crap.

Thursday, November 29, 2007


Some days are better than others

Wednesday, November 28, 2007


Love is blindness

Tuesday, November 27, 2007


Wocka, wocka, wocka!

Because I know deep down you really care, and because I would rather think about this than the terrible, no good, rotten day I had, here is the joke that was etched on my brain after curiosity got the better of me (777 clean jokes? really?), causing me to open a casually placed bathroom book :

Hickory dickory dock,
The mice ran up the clock,
The clock struck one,
And the others escaped with minor injuries.

Kind of gives the what's-brown-and-sounds-like-a-bell? joke a run for its money, though Justin's stop sign knock-knock joke will always be my favorite.

Monday, November 26, 2007



I've been slumped in front of the computer for thirty minutes, taunted by a blinking cursor and a stupid joke. I have writer's block because of this joke. I could understand it and maybe even forgive it for knocking me out of the running for my very own sock zombie if it were actually funny, or even mildly amusing. But it's not. It's terrible. And it's the only thing I've been able to think about since I sat down to write. So, fine, joke. You win. Thanks for nothing. I'm going to bed.

Sunday, November 25, 2007


Wayne Manor

I drove to OKC on Friday to help Rickus paint baby Levi's room. They're decorating the nursery in a safari theme and decided green and brown walls would go swell with all the elephants and giraffes and monkeys. It's a really cute room for what is destined to be a really cute kid.

Before I left on Saturday, Katie offered to take me by Wayne's house. I figured a quick run there and back couldn't hurt. It wasn't far, a few blocks, maybe a mile away, so he's practically a neighbor. He's probably not even there. Besides, he seems like such a friendly guy and really if he didn't want folks to drive by his house in the middle of the day at ridiculously slow speeds he wouldn't have put the cross streets near his home into his documentary, right? Still, I felt a little weird about it since driving by the home of one of your rock heroes might be misconstrued as borderline stalker behavior, and I said as much. Briefly. While climbing into Katie's car.

We get there and I immediately fall in love with the windows, which have a colorful design swirled across the top. As I'm gushing about the windows and how great the house is and how great it is that Wayne is so down to earth and accessible (I could walk right up to his door and ring the bell! in theory), I catch some movement in the second story. It was Wayne. Washing windows. He mows his own lawn and does windows. I try not to point. Katie turns the car around at the end of the block (he'll just think we're lost, she says) and makes one more pass by his house before we head back to 24th street.

Is it weird that one of the highlights of my Thanksgiving holiday was getting to see Wayne Coyne doing household chores?

Saturday, November 24, 2007


Hang on tight

You gotta hold on

Friday, November 23, 2007



'Hey, Katie. Today is the twenty-third. That means you're twenty-nine... and a half.'

'Ugh. You're right. I'm going to be THIRTY in six months.' *pause* 'Well, if today is the twenty-third, and I'm twenty-nine and a half, that makes you twenty-nine and three quarters.'

'Shh. It'll hear you.'

Thursday, November 22, 2007


Crazy Horse had a magic shirt, too

When I was little, it was rare that I ever left my grandparents' house empty handed. My grandfather always sent some little something home with me, like the pennies he happened to have in his pocket or sticks and rocks from his driveway. Consequently, my grandfather was responsible for starting my rock collection, which has come along with me every time I've ever moved and is currently stashed in the closet in a red bucket with a white lid marked beef brains. The bucket was also given to me by my grandfather. He used to be a butcher. He's given me other things, too, like his old harmonica in its blue case, and during one visit he gave me his bag of marbles after spending the afternoon teaching me how to shoot. Occasionally, I get them down for Maya now. I'm still not very good, but they're pretty cool, those marbles. The cat's eyes are my favorite.

My grandfather has a magic shirt. He would let us grandkids sleep in it while we were there, especially if we were scared. The magic shirt made you run really fast, and we all thought this was super keen.

He built a goldfish pond for my grandmother at their house in the country. It was near the weeping willow tree. It was made of sand stone. Most of my grandfather's constructions involved native rocks. So much so that as a child if we passed a rock house I would remark that it must be a PaPa Hardy house.

My grandfather has only been hospitalized twice. The first time was several years ago for a detached retina. The other time is right now, for vascular dementia and a stroke. I went to visit him tonight. I wish I had had a magic shirt.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007


Sweetness and light

Tuesday, November 20, 2007



Monday, November 19, 2007


Holland, 1945

Okay, I've got nothing. Almost nothing. There's a song by Neutral Milk Hotel that's been following me around. I don't really know much about the band. In fact, I think I've only heard this one song, but this one song is just so gosh darn infectious. Anyway, I noticed it earlier this evening as I was walking and then again in between pages of The Peek-a-Boo Caterpillar, and it was also in the dark with me and my daughter when I put her to bed. It's not the happiest song, but sometimes sad songs make the best songs to hum along to. For days.

Sunday, November 18, 2007


Somebody come and play


Saturday, November 17, 2007



cash advance

You know what this means, don't you? That's right. More poop jokes.

Friday, November 16, 2007


Pretty nice hair cut

So, this afternoon I allowed a girl named Amy to cut off my hair. I am still trying to get used to it, but I think... I think I'm going to like it. I have a stocking cap on stand-by, just in case.

Thursday, November 15, 2007


Days that used to be

Wednesday, November 14, 2007


Who wants to go to silly old Hungaria, anyway?

About the title? Don't ask. The important thing is NOT that I would ever mistakenly refer to Hungary as anything other than Hungary, because that would be silly, but that I have the chance to go there, to Hungary, for two weeks next summer. Justin has been very very very very very very very (remaining verys omitted to save time) strongly advised to accept a summer internship teaching English as a second language in Budapest, the capital city of Hungary and one of the top European destinations for tourists (and TESL students, apparently), and he is very very very very keen on going. He is also very keen on my going along, and though I am always whining about how much I don't get to travel, especially to destinations in Europe, I am having a hard time convincing myself that Budapest is the place to spend two weeks. Isn't that crazy? Who wouldn't want to go to Budapest? Maybe it's the people who aren't confident enough to explore a foreign city alone while their spouse teaches English all day. Or the people who can't read maps without turning them so that they point in the direction they are actually traveling. Or the ones that have somehow convinced themselves that they will only get one shot at Europe and they really had their heart set on Rome or Paris. Budapest seems lovely and the bath houses sound like great fun, but I haven't been able to get excited about experiencing the city alone, even if it's just part of the time. Still, the trip is several months away and I can't in good faith dismiss Budapest without at least exploring the food angle.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007



A five-minute slice of Paris from Joel and Ethan, who are perhaps my most favorite of favorite directors. I luff them. With two f's.

Monday, November 12, 2007


Ralston Opera Company


And the conversation died

Him: Damn. That woman has enormous jugs.

Me (reading, not really paying attention): Jugs of what?

Him: Jugs of tit.

Sunday, November 11, 2007


Bed, bed, bed

We're back. We're tuckered out. We're going to bed. Who knew watching someone open baby gifts all afternoon while shoveling cake in your mouth could be so exhausting?

Saturday, November 10, 2007


Take a little trip

The McFamily and I rolled out of bed this morning 8:30ish so we would have plenty of time to get all of our Saturday morning loafin-round-the-house-in-our-jammies-because-we-slack-like-that in before finally loading up some four hours later to leave for Okrahoma City so we could hang out with Katie and Rick before all the cute gifting and baby belly ogling starts at the Shower Sunday afternoon.

Five minutes before we were set to leave I pulled down our stash of gift bags to find one for our gift. And five minutes before we left, I realized we had nothing suitable. All of the gift bags from Maya's baby shower were pink and girly. We would have to make a stop somewhere to get a bag. I called Katie to giver her our ETA and of course told on myself basically from hello, because that's what I do, and Katie offered the use of one of HER gift bags, because that's what she does. And sadly I thought long and hard about taking her up on it because a) I was ready to get to her house already and b) I'm lazy and c) I don't usually like going into stores all that much, but for Target I'll usually make an exception. Luckily, my husband stepped in and rescued me from my ridiculousness and told both me and Katie we'd be making a stop on the way. I love stops.

Anyway, things seem to always have a way of working out in the end. Turns out Katie lives RIGHT down the street from a Target, so I was able to pick up a gift bag for the shower AND another little sommin' sommin' for baby Levi, this time something that actually made the registry! Another gift to keep secret! And to help make sure it stays secret, Rick and Katie cover their ears and leave the room anytime I try to even hint at what's in the bag. They're such awesome friends. I love them.

Tonight we went out for yummy seafood at Pearls and tomorrow the big kids will take the little ones to the Omniplex while the girls gather for the baby shower. I hope there's cake.

Friday, November 09, 2007


Outside In

Thursday, November 08, 2007


Sitting still

Wednesday, November 07, 2007


Tumble down

This afternoon I watched as a young girl slowly tumbled from one end of the block to the other. Starting at the corner shop, she lifted her arms and bent backwards, arching to the ground and connecting before walking over. She turned and then stood briefly on her hands before toppling over in another arch, catching herself with her feet and standing. Then, hand-hand-foot-foot, she completed a fluid cartwheel. She repeated these same three tricks over and over in the same order as she traveled down the sidewalk. The girl looked to be around six or seven, the same age I was when I was enrolled in a gymnastics class, only this girl was much more graceful and more fearless. I was never able to successfully complete a back bend because I was always too afraid. I was afraid of falling and afraid of being hurt in general, so whenever I'd attempt a back bend I'd pause in the middle and the trick would end with me flat on my back instead of in a smooth arch. I stopped going to class after six months. I walked on as she ran back to the corner shop to begin again.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007


Up in the sky

Last night we huddled in our driveway for a bit to check out a comet I had read about earlier in the day. [Note: this means I was outside for an extended period of time twice in one day. I've almost met my quota!] The article didn't have any images of 17P/Holmes, but I have gone out to gawk at a comet before, so I was expecting to see something a little more like this instead of what we actually saw - a circular, fuzzy smudge in the sky. Still, it's a (naked-eye!) comet and it is unique and interesting and worth the cold nose and fingers to search for it in the night sky. Besides, your inner geek will thank you.

Monday, November 05, 2007


Playing in the fall

This morning
Maya stood in the living room watching the leaves fall through the window. After a few minutes, without taking her eyes off the swirling leaves, she asked if she could put on some fall clothes and could she go outside and play in the fall. So, I dressed her in some fall clothes and we went outside to play. Well, she played. I mostly made a nuisance of myself by sticking a camera in her face while she zigzagged across the yard like mad or while she searched for all the red leaves.

Sunday, November 04, 2007


She's having a baby... shower

Hi! My pregnant friend Katie? She's having a baby shower. Soon. Next weekend, in fact, so that doesn't exactly leave me enough time to order any item(s) from her registry. But that's ooookay, because for perhaps the first time ever I was able to admit that I would misunderestimate the amount of time I had to make my gift purchase and took a little preemptive action. I know. It's shocking. Anyway, when I ordered Justin's post-birthday presents, I included a little sommin' sommin' for Katie and Rick. Something baby Levi related. Something they DIDN'T ASK FOR! I couldn't believe how easy it was, buying a gift early! And how good it feels to be kind of - prepared. I don't get to experience that very often. I'm bursting to tell what it is, not because it's the best baby gift ever but because it's a problem I have -- keeping gifts, especially a secret gift, secret. But I won't tell. Not until the baby shower, right before Katie rips off the paper. Okay, who am I kidding? Before she removes the (recycled) tissue paper from the gift bag (also recycled...and most likely from my baby shower). And then I'll bust out the super nifty new to baby Levi items that I dug out of Maya's closet.


On the prairie

Saturday, November 03, 2007



You. are. in. trouble. Go sit in the naughty chair.


Somehow, threatening your spouse with a naughty chair as punishment does not quite have the same effect as it does on your daughter.

Friday, November 02, 2007


Rear window

There is a window behind my desk. I share it with a neighboring co-worker and anyone else on the third floor who happens to pass by. It is drafty and can make the winter months ridiculously cold, and the view isn't always terribly interesting. My supervisor has offered to let any of us on the north side of the building move to a desk on the other side of the office, away from the windows. But, it is through my window that I notice the first color bursts of autumn on the hill and the fluffy cottonball clouds and tiny, dare-devil insects resting on the screen in the summer and that 6th street cracked and splintered after a particularly bad ice storm a few years ago. On trips to the printer, I notice little old ladies going to their hair appointments at the beauty shop and the kindness shown to those who come on Tuesdays and Thursdays for a sack of groceries at the food pantry next door. I notice the absence of sunlight on overcast days and how sometimes only every other square of sidewalk across the street appears to be wet when it rains. And in early November I begin to watch for the first signs of the holidays as decorations start to appear downtown. In fact, the first Christmas tree made its appearance on a corner street lamp this afternoon with the help of some city workers. I guess it is for these reasons I have never moved. I need the view, even if it is just the small view from my drafty window.

Thursday, November 01, 2007


I want candy.

Bags of delicious Halloween candy: $8
Bowl for distribution of delicious Halloween candy: $3
Making the decision to go back on a diet around Halloween: Priceless


A ghost story

At the beginning of October, I started pestering Maya about her Halloween costume. What do you wanna be? What do you wanna be? Because this year, I wanted to be on-the-ball-amazingly-with-it SUPER Mom instead of Oops! Sorry! Wait-til-the-last-minute-then-run-around-in-a-crazy-panic Procrastinating Mom. Finally, she answers. A princess. Actually she shouts this, repeatedly, while intermittently jumping up and down, and who can blame her, really, after being asked over a zillion times? So, okay. A princess. That's doable. Uncharacteristically optimistic, I start my search for a pretty pretty princess dress, only I can't seem to find a dress in any stores that a) fit or b) weren't gawd awful tacky or c) fit. The pretend stores on the internets weren't much better. While the Disney Store did have some adorably ickle-wickle sweet dresses, none of them a) fit or b) justified the price, really, unless Miss Maya wore her pretty princess dress every day from now until next Spring... or at least Christmas (Thanksgiving, maybe?) or c) fit.

In the end, Dad suggested a homemade costume. Yes! Of course. We MAKE the costume! Very parent-like! Oh, but it has to be something simple because on-the-ball-amazingly-with-it Super Mom? Can't sew. But she can suggest costume ideas, and to Super Mom, nothing screams classic, homemade Halloween made easy like a ghost. So, we dug an old sheet out of the wardrobe, took measurements, worked some scissor magic, borrowed some white makeup from Grandma, and presto! a ghost costume for Maya.

Admittedly, she looked a bit like a nun, too. Maybe she was a ghost nun. Yesiree. Nothing like dressing your child up like a dead member of a religious order for Halloween.

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